Open Source Software and Linux

Dec 17 2008   3:16PM GMT

Sometimes it’s the tech support and not the user..

John Little Profile: Xjlittle

Ok we’ve always had a good laugh at users saying and doing dumb things that to us are obvious. I ran across this web site that not only points out user foolishness but some not so smart tech support as well. Read on…

* Customer: “Hi, I can’t seem to connect you guys are you having a problem?”
* Tech Support: “Well sir, what dialup software are you using?”
* Customer: “The one you provided.”
* Tech Support: “And what version is it?”
* Customer: (says the version number)
* Tech Support: “Oh, that’s the problem you need the latest version.”
* Customer: “Ok, how do I get it?”
* Tech Support: “Well, just transfer the file via FTP.”
* Customer: “Well that would be nice, but I can’t connect to the Internet.”
* Tech Support: (sounding exasperated) “I told you just to FTP the file sir.”

I hung up.

I’m not the most technical of people, but a few years ago, I got the infamous “blue screen of death.” I called in the IT department, and the new guy told me that my monitor just had to be “de-gassed” (degaussed). Needless to say, I rolled around the floor laughing, and someone else was called in to replace my hard drive.

And this one goes both ways..

My boyfriend and I were sitting in my dorm room, when there was a power surge, causing my computer to reboot. Unfortunately, it never got very far and popped up an error message about a missing file. Panicking, I reboot again, and the same thing happened. Foolishly, I decided to call my computer’s tech support line, and after struggling with their automated system, I finally got through to someone.

* Tech Support: “Thank you for calling tech support. How may I help you?”
* Me: “Yeah, um, I just had a power surge in my dorm room, and my computer won’t reboot. It’s giving me the error message: [error message]”
* Tech Support: “Have you tried rebooting?”
* Me: “Yeah. Want me to try again?”
* Tech Support: “Yes, go ahead. Tell me when Windows comes up.”
* Me: “Ok…it’s giving me the same error message. It’s not even getting into Windows.”
* Tech Support: “Ok, let’s try rebooting again, but this time, hold the button down for longer.”
* Me: “Er…how much longer?”
* Tech Support: “About five seconds.”
* Me: “All right. Holding it down now…ok, it’s rebooting.”
* Tech Support: “Good. Tell me when Windows comes up.”
* Me: “Same error.”
* Tech Support: “Ok. Let’s try a hard reboot. Turn your computer all the way off, then unplug the power cable.”
* Me: (??) “All right, it’s out.”
* Tech Support: “Ok, now hold down your power button and plug it back in. But don’t let go of the power button yet.”
* Me: “Er. Ok. Tell me when to let go.”
* Tech Support: “Ok, let go. Tell me when Windows comes up.”
* Me: “Same error message. Windows isn’t coming up.”
* Tech Support: “Ok, let’s try looking at your BIOS.”
* Me: “All right.”
* Tech Support: “Reboot your computer, and when it’s coming up, hit F1 as many times as you can.”
* Me: “Can’t I just hit it once?”
* Tech Support: “No, your computer should start beeping. I want to make sure it beeps.”
* Me: “All right, it beeped. BIOS came up a while ago.”
* Tech Support: “Ok, let’s walk through some things….”

He proceeded to do nothing more than confirm there was nothing wrong with my BIOS. He had me reboot again, and, of course, I got the same error message.

* Tech Support: “Ok, let’s try bios one more time.”
* Me: “All right.”
* Tech Support: “Now, when it’s rebooting, I want you to hit the F1 key as many times as you can. It has to beep for this to work.”
* Me: “I really don’t think my computer ‘beeping’ has anything to do with the problem.”
* Tech Support: “I think I know a little more about computers than you do, ma’am.”
* Me: “All right, fine, I’m hitting it. My computer is beeping.”
* Tech Support: “I don’t believe you.”
* Me: “…Excuse me?”
* Tech Support: “I think you’re lying. I need you to hit it as many times as you can. This is very important.”

Finally, I gave up on the guy and made my boyfriend finish the call. About half a minute into the call, my boyfriend gets a really funny look on his face and ejects the floppy disk that was in the drive. He rebooted it, and it worked fine.

I suppose this doubles as a stupid user story too, but you’d think a tech support person would have checked for that early on, instead all the other dumb things he had me do.

Many thanks to rinkworks for providing some humor for our day.


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