May 12 2011   9:03PM GMT

Jamie Oliver cyborg will slim fat Americans

KarlFl40 Profile: KarlFl40

A school in the US is using cameras linked to computers to get kids eating better.

The theory is the cameras will take a picture of what is on a child’s lunch tray. Analysis of the images will be able to work out how many calories the kids are eating.

A unique barcode will identify the child and report back to parents, who will tell the kids to eat better, if they can be bothered to get off their fat a*s*s that is.

Are we so reliant on computers that we can’t help kids eat better? Why is the school serving rubbish food anyway?

If you want a technology solution it is simple. Create a robotic Jamie Oliver and give him an Oozy 9mm. He tried to do it the nice way here in the UK but the US challenge requires cyber chef. Imagine the cyborg confronting fat teenagers with the line: “I need your fries, your lard and your turkey twisters.”

The alternative is to stop giving your kids money for food

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