Security Corner

Jun 30 2009   8:30PM GMT

Lighten up! Computer Humor of all Sorts

Ken Harthun Ken Harthun Profile: Ken Harthun

June is almost over and none to soon. I’m not one for wishing the time to fly, but in this case, I’m glad it did: It has been a very stressful month. Security can be a tough gig. So, it’s time to lighten up a bit with some geeky computer humor I found at http://www.gdargaud.net/Humor/QuotesComputer.html:

Users /nm./: collective term for those who use computers. Users are divided into three types: novice, intermediate and expert.
Novice Users: people who are afraid that simply pressing a key might break their computer.
Intermediate Users: people who don’t know how to fix their computer after they’ve just pressed a key that broke it.
Expert Users: people who break other people’s computers.
— From the Jargon File.

Login: yes
Password: i dont have one
password is incorrect

Login: yes
Password: incorrect

“Morons. These people who live in my apartment complex are connected to my wireless. They must think they’re super-cool hackers by breaking into my completely unsecured network. Unfortunately, the connection works both ways. Long story short, they now have loads of horse porn on their computer.”    — Mootar from bash.org.

Helpdesk: Double click on “My Computer”
User: I can’t see your computer.
Helpdesk: No, double click on “My Computer” on your computer.
User: Huh?
Helpdesk: There is an icon on your computer labeled “My Computer”. Double click on it.
User: What’s your computer doing on mine?

I’ll leave you with this one (I’ve actually pulled off a similar prank with backups):

“Whenever my Boss pisses me off, I secretly change the password to his e-mail account.
When he can’t log on, he’ll piss and moan for 5 minutes, cursing the computer. Then he’ll come groveling to me for my help. Once he’s groveled enough, I re-enter the right password from my office, go to his and watch him look like a dummy while I log-on easily.
I just love it. Heh, heh, heh.”

Here’s to a great rest of the summer!

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