QA Focus

Aug 29 2008   2:51AM GMT

Have YOU been abducted by test tools?

Sentinel627 Greg Annen Profile: Sentinel627

Have You Been ABDUCTED by Your Test Automation Tools?

Here are some simple questions that you need to ask yourself:

#1. Have you experienced missing or lost time of any length, particularly of one or more hours, waiting for a screen to refresh?

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#2. Have you awakened to find yourself seemingly paralyzed or restrained for no reason and felt an unexplainable presence (your boss, waiting for results) near you?

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#3. Have you found any unusual psychological scars or marks with no possible explanation on how you received them? If so, did you have an adverse emotional reaction to them?

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#4. Have you seen balls of light or flashes of light in your eyes while NOT staring at your monitor waiting for “something to happen”?

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#5. Have you had memories of flying through the air which did NOT seem like a dream? (Well, maybe this has nothing to do with test tools — or so they want you to believe)

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#6. Have you had a “marked memory” that would not go away? (i.e., Windows blue screens, “General run error” messages, pain points in your fingers, etc.)

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#6. Have you seen beams of light outside your office, or shining into your cube through a window?

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#7. Do you have repeated dreams of ‘for…next’ loops, where you are doing the iteration?

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#8. Have you had one or more “trouble ticket” close-encounters at anytime your life?

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#9. Have you experienced feelings of cosmic awareness or a great concerned interest in ecology, the environment, vegetarianism, or anything else totally unrelated to test automation?

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#10. Do you have a strong sense that you have an important mission or task to perform, without knowing where this compulsion came from or what your mission is? (Note: this could mean you are a developer)

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#11. Have unexplainable events occurred during business hours that have left you feeling strangely anxious afterwards?

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#12. Have you ever awakened in a place where you were supposed to be working, or don’t remember ever going to sleep? (i.e. upside down in your chair, or under your desk)

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#13. Do you experience an uncontrollable fear when your movements are watched by a supervisor?

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#14. Do you have a strong adverse reaction to PowerPoint slides or even drawings of application architecture?

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#15. Do you have inexplicably strong phobias such as: keyboards, monitors, error messages, certain sounds, bright lights, heights or being alone?

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#16. Do you experience frequent self-esteem problems, for example: your appearance, abilities, ideas or decisions that you make throughout the SDLC?

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#17. Have you ever seen any other person in your presence become paralyzed, motionless or seemingly frozen in time, especially someone you work with?

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#18. Do you find yourself obsessed with the subject of test automation and/or software requirements resulting in a compulsive urge to research and study as much material on the subject as you can possibly find, such as books, user guides, the internet, etc.?

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#19. Do you frequently get the feeling that you are being watched, by more than one set of eyes, particularly while coding test scripts?

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#20. Do you have recurring but very pleasant dreams of floating through a closed window, door or a solid wall — anywhere away from your desk?

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#21. Have you had chronic sinusitis or nasal problems?

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#22. Do you have frequent or sporadic headaches, especially in your sinus cavity, behind one eye, or in one ear?

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#23. Do you often feel like you are going crazy for even thinking about such unbelievable things like “unattended execution”, “simple functions”, “stable networks”, “requirements”, etc?

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#24. Have you ever had any paranormal or psychic experiences, including Descriptive Programming?

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#25. Are you prone to be compulsive or act obsessively? (Note: this could also mean you are a developer)

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#26. Do you believe that you have ever received or channeled telepathic requirements from subject matter experts?

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#27. Have you ever been terrified of your cubical, now or every Monday morning?

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#28. Have you been having problems maintaining a serious relationship because you have this mysterious “feeling” that if you become involved with someone it will interfere with some important “automation” that you must do?

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#29. Do you have a difficult time trusting other people, especially authority figures?

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#30. Do you get the feeling that it is forbidden to discuss automation with anyone in management?

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If you answered “Yes” to ten or more of these questions, there is a very good chance that you have been abducted by your test tools, either once or perhaps even frequently.

There are several devices you can purchase from the author (for a modest fee) to protect yourself from recurring attacks. Examples are shown below.

Stop Test Tool Abductions! Oh, the humanity!

Inquiries welcome.

;-))

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